Stupid married to James Potter things according to Lily Evans

jamespotterstolemyknickers:

the final instalment in this 3 part series (Part 1/ Part 2)

  • moving in into this small single bedroom flat on the outskirts of muggle London together as soon as their out of school
  • James proposing about a month later
  • the two of them searching for just the right place to get married
  • running into Voldemort one day while out doing that and he offers the two of them a spot within the Death Eaters
  • they turn him down and wands are drawn in a brief skirmish before they managed to escape having defeated Voldemort for the first time
  • deciding that maybe a small wedding with only their close friends would suffice
  • having the wedding two weeks later and inviting the Order 
  • Sirius’ best man speech ‘You’ll never get rid of us now Evans- I mean Potter’
  • James using every single possible moment he could get to call her Lily Potter
  • finally getting to sleep in the same bed without worrying about having to get back to their dormitory or flat in time
  • realising that he snores and it’s the funniest thing in the world to her
  • waking up in the middle of the night because someone decided to steal all the blankets from her
  • pressing her cold feet against him in return
  • getting to steal his clothes because that’s what good wives do
  • him acting like a total dork when she prances around the house in just his shirts and a pair of knickers
  • her teasing him for being speechless when he sees her in his shirt a pair of knickers
  • shirt and pair of knickers subsequently discarded somewhere on the floor or the lamp or the chair
  • that one time she sent him out to buy a bottle of milk because she was sick and they had ran out
  • coming back with two bags full of sweets and biscuits and maybe an entire grocery bag is filled with just pick and mix because why buy one bag with one type of sweet when he could buy one bag with several types of sweets
  • priorities, he has them
  • he didn’t buy the milk though
  • but he did find a cat and brought it home ‘can we keep her Lils, please?’
  • a little disagreeable orange fuzzball that stayed with them forever
  • going to Order meetings together
  • helping capture Death Eaters and fight against those wanting pureblood supremacy
  • panicking when he gets injured in a raid and refusing to leave his side at the hospital even though the healers said that he would be fine
  • taking a week for themselves when he’s released from the hospital and maybe playing scrabble for the majority of that time
  • because they’re not going to leave the house and what else is there to do besides play scrabble
  • naked scrabble
  • okay they’re doing the sex thing
  • waking up and blearily stumbling into the kitchen where he’s making breakfast for the two of them
  • making breakfast without a shirt and only in his boxers
  • the toast almost burns
  • learning that the kitchen counter is a bad place to play scrabble
  • the table is obviously much easier
  • probably playing scrabble on every available surface of their little flat
  • other Marauders learning that they should probably owl a few days in advance before visiting because they’re pretty sure that they could have gone their whole lives without knowing about that birthmark she had
  • fighting over stupid things like who’s turn is it to put the cat out or clean the bathroom
  • then he does the jaw thing which gets to her more now than it ever did in school
  • and soon the arguments stop because they realise that hey mouths can be put to more use somewhere else and whoops they’re playing scrabble again
  • scrabble scrabble scrabble
  • Harry was an oops baby do you seriously think the two of them weren’t doing the naked pretzel in pretty much all of their free time
  • doesn’t need to worry about lusting after him in a towel any more because that’s one of the perks of being married
  • she could stare at him as long as she wants to
  • and then he’ll start making dirty jokes again
  • we all know what happens next
  • I’m going to stop with the sex things now because there’s more to married life than sex (sadly)
  • not being paired with him to go on Order missions any more because the noble git tries to protect her and THAT’S HOW HE GOT IN THE HOSPITAL IN THE FIRST PLACE
  • SHE COULD TAKE CARE OF HERSELF
  • (although it’s sort of cute and sweet when he does it but still)
  • cuDDLING
  • cuddling in bed
  • cuddling in front of the fire
  • cuddling before sex
  • cuddling after sex
  • cuddling all the time I just
  • SO MANY CUDDLING MOMENTS
  • spending Christmas by inviting all the Order members over to their little flat and sharing out gifts
  • she bakes a cake (she bakes several cakes) and James keeps on swiping batter when she’s not looking
  • eventually she puts him out of the kitchen and tells him to go finish decorating the flat with Sirius and for the love of Merlin DO NOT BURN DOWN THE TREE AGAIN
  • never knowing where to hide his presents because they live in a small single bedroom studio flat there aren’t much hiding places
  • getting into their first serious fight as husband and wife and throwing her wedding ring at him while the returned to using insults from circa fifth year
  • he sleeps on the couch that night
  • the two of them a miserable and sad and she’s been crying and so has he but he hides it better
  • making up the day after because they can’t go without the other for long and promising to try and talk things out next time something like that happens

Read More

lupanaoflaminar:

caffeinatedfeminist:

[TW: Rape]
faysbook:

serenitywarrior:

leetakeuchi:

Gun-toting granny Ava Estelle, 81, was so ticked-off when two thugs raped her 18-year-old granddaughter that she tracked the unsuspecting ex-cons down… And shot off their testicles.
“The old lady spent a week hunting those men down and, when she found them, she took revenge on them in her own special way,” said police investigator Evan Delp.
Then she took a taxi to the nearest police station, laid the gun on the sergeant’s desk and told him as calm as could be: “Those bastards will never rape anybody again, by God.”
Cops say convicted rapist and robber Davis Furth, 33, lost both his penis and his testicles when outraged Ava opened fire with a 9-mm pistol in the hotel room where he and former prison cell mate Stanley Thomas, 29, were holed up.
The wrinkled avenger also blew Thomas’ testicles to kingdom come, but doctors managed to save his mangled penis, police said. “The one guy, Thomas, didn’t lose his manhood, but the doctor I talked to said he won’t be using it the way he used to,” Detective Delp told reporters. “Both men are still in pretty bad shape, but I think they’re just happy to be alive after what they’ve been through.”
The Rambo Granny swung into action August 21 after her granddaughter Debbie was carjacked and raped in broad daylight by two knife-wielding creeps in a section of town bordering on skid row. “When I saw the look on my Debbie’s face that night in the hospital, I decided I was going to go out and get those bastards myself ‘cause I figured the Law would go easy on them,”’ recalled the retired library worker. ” And I wasn’t scared of them, either - because I’ve got me a gun and I’ve been shooting’ all my life. And I wasn’t dumb enough to turn it in when the law changed about owning one.”
So, using a police artist’s sketch of the suspects and Debbie’s description of the sickos, tough-as-nails Ava spent seven days prowling the wino-infested neighbourhood where the crime took place till she spotted the ill-fated rapists entering their flophouse hotel.
“I knew it was them the minute I saw ‘em, but I shot a picture of ‘em anyway and took it back to Debbie and she said sure as hell, it was them,” the oldster recalled…
“So I went back to that hotel and found their room and knocked on the door, and the minute the big one opened the door, I shot ‘em right square between the legs, right where it would really hurt ‘em most, you know. Then I went in and shot the other one as he backed up pleading to me to spare him. Then I went down to the police station and turned myself in.”
Now, baffled lawmen are trying to figure out exactly how to deal with the vigilante granny.. “What she did was wrong, and she broke the law, but it is difficult to throw an 81-year-old woman in prison,” Det. Delp said, “especially when 3 million people in the city want to nominate her for Mayor.”


DAMN.

No mercy for rapists.


"It is difficult to throw an 81-year-old woman in prison,” Det. Delp said, “especially when 3 million people in the city want to nominate her for Mayor.” OH MY GOD

lupanaoflaminar:

caffeinatedfeminist:

[TW: Rape]

faysbook:

serenitywarrior:

leetakeuchi:

Gun-toting granny Ava Estelle, 81, was so ticked-off when two thugs raped her 18-year-old granddaughter that she tracked the unsuspecting ex-cons down… And shot off their testicles.

“The old lady spent a week hunting those men down and, when she found them, she took revenge on them in her own special way,” said police investigator Evan Delp.

Then she took a taxi to the nearest police station, laid the gun on the sergeant’s desk and told him as calm as could be: “Those bastards will never rape anybody again, by God.”

Cops say convicted rapist and robber Davis Furth, 33, lost both his penis and his testicles when outraged Ava opened fire with a 9-mm pistol in the hotel room where he and former prison cell mate Stanley Thomas, 29, were holed up.

The wrinkled avenger also blew Thomas’ testicles to kingdom come, but doctors managed to save his mangled penis, police said. “The one guy, Thomas, didn’t lose his manhood, but the doctor I talked to said he won’t be using it the way he used to,” Detective Delp told reporters. “Both men are still in pretty bad shape, but I think they’re just happy to be alive after what they’ve been through.”

The Rambo Granny swung into action August 21 after her granddaughter Debbie was carjacked and raped in broad daylight by two knife-wielding creeps in a section of town bordering on skid row. “When I saw the look on my Debbie’s face that night in the hospital, I decided I was going to go out and get those bastards myself ‘cause I figured the Law would go easy on them,”’ recalled the retired library worker. ” And I wasn’t scared of them, either - because I’ve got me a gun and I’ve been shooting’ all my life. And I wasn’t dumb enough to turn it in when the law changed about owning one.”

So, using a police artist’s sketch of the suspects and Debbie’s description of the sickos, tough-as-nails Ava spent seven days prowling the wino-infested neighbourhood where the crime took place till she spotted the ill-fated rapists entering their flophouse hotel.

“I knew it was them the minute I saw ‘em, but I shot a picture of ‘em anyway and took it back to Debbie and she said sure as hell, it was them,” the oldster recalled…

“So I went back to that hotel and found their room and knocked on the door, and the minute the big one opened the door, I shot ‘em right square between the legs, right where it would really hurt ‘em most, you know. Then I went in and shot the other one as he backed up pleading to me to spare him. Then I went down to the police station and turned myself in.”

Now, baffled lawmen are trying to figure out exactly how to deal with the vigilante granny.. “What she did was wrong, and she broke the law, but it is difficult to throw an 81-year-old woman in prison,” Det. Delp said, “especially when 3 million people in the city want to nominate her for Mayor.”

image

DAMN.

No mercy for rapists.

"It is difficult to throw an 81-year-old woman in prison,” Det. Delp said, “especially when 3 million people in the city want to nominate her for Mayor.” OH MY GOD

Reblogged from romanitas

Jerza: amusement park date »> whole scenario. Erza was “so frightened”  when they went through the Horror House that she clung to Jellal through the whole walk, not knowing that her boyfriend was also scared out of his wits. Jellal just struggled to get them through the maze, screaming in the inside while blushing and trying his best to remain non-chalant on the outside. In the end, Jellal  decided to let her relax in the shooting games which in turn soon got out of hand.

Jerza: amusement park date »> whole scenario. Erza was “so frightened”  when they went through the Horror House that she clung to Jellal through the whole walk, not knowing that her boyfriend was also scared out of his wits. Jellal just struggled to get them through the maze, screaming in the inside while blushing and trying his best to remain non-chalant on the outside. In the end, Jellal  decided to let her relax in the shooting games which in turn soon got out of hand.